In my case, I just want healthy, happy kids and a relaxing day — not one fraught with hurrying to get dressed up, and sit at brunch or dinner with hundreds of other moms.

I’m not alone. An article in the Chicago Tribune posed the question to moms of all ages. Women with babies wanted to sleep. Other moms wanted shoes — now there’s one of my favorite requests! And some women loved the gifts kids made in school. I remember a paper teacup decorated lovingly by my kids, and it held a real tea bag — it was wonderful. So were little plants that I could watch grow.

In a poll on Lifetimemoms.com, it was an even split between no mom responsibilities for the day and a nice relaxing day with family. For another take on what to do, here’s a first-time dad’s efforts on a very thoughtful Mothers Day.

For stepmoms …

If you’re a stepmom, God bless you, sister! Some of the Internet articles are just downright depressing, so read them at your own risk. Stepmoms wrote about being insulted, unappreciated, disrespected and more. As a stepmom for nine years, my advice is to let it go. Over the years, stepkids have repeatedly told me that I’m not family. On the other hand, I’ve also been thanked for advice and shown appreciation.

Here’s a great stepmom article by Lylah M. Alphonse, Senior Editor, Yahoo! Shine. She noted that Sunday, May 20 is Stepmothers Day — something one thoughtful little 9-year-old girl invented 12 years ago for her stepmom. The Stepmothers Day website includes hugs you can send to other stepmoms. Even Oprah recognized it. If you really find yourself stressing over this and other holidays, visit Stepfamilycenter.com

Pam Parker is the editor of Lake Erie LifeStyle, Her Times and House to Home at the Erie Times-News in Erie, Pa.