The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin has a report that says being good parents has a lot to do with being good partners. Compassion, caring and other no-duh words come into play in the Huffington Post analysis of the report.
It also separates us into three parenting groups: authoritarian old-schoolers who believe in strict discipline; permissive parents, who set few boundaries; and authoritative, folks who set boundaries but add some warmth and love.
I know lots of parents, and some of them scare me. Read my blog on the scary parents of Aubrey Ireland — the poor kid has a restraining order on her helicopter parents.
As parents, we need to help kids move along in the world — not smother them. I never chose my kids’ daily outfits and I never overanalyzed their friends. I didn’t like some of them (the outfits and the friends), but now that they are all in their 20s (the friends not the outfits — none of them kept an outfit that long — except my daughter, maybe), they all seemed to turn out OK — even though there were many bumps in the road. Many bumps.
Here’s a link to a feature on 10 great parenting tips. There really are only a few tips that matter though. Love them. Tell them you love them, and love them enough to remind them that everyone fails at something, makes mistakes and gets back up. We all fail at something. We have to learn from failures. And remember — kids are not you or your spouse. They are the best of both of you.