I don’t know where to begin this week. I feel like every day I keep working harder and just pray to get the results I’ve been dreaming of for so long. I think reality hit me in the face harder than I was expecting. We got weighed again and in two weeks I have lost about 5 pounds. Under normal circumstances I would be completely thrilled, but I have been pushing myself more than I thought possible. I know the weight isn’t going to just fall off. Am I wrong for wishing it would?!
I’ve been overweight pretty much my entire life. It’s something I’m used to and that scares me. I don’t want to be stuck being the “chubby” girl anymore! The funny thing is that when I look in the mirror I don’t see myself as being overweight. Am I crazy? Don’t get me wrong, I know that I am, but it’s not what I see. I am in love with make-up, jewelry, and anything pink, and when I get dolled up to go out, I look in the mirror and say “dang I look good”. Then I see pictures of myself and my body and it breaks my heart. It’s tough seeing that I really am that big.
I think the one thing I want to make clear however, is that I do believe I am beautiful. I also hope that every other girl in this competition and everyone out there reading this knows how beautiful they are too. This world is full of a lot of terrible people, with terrible things to say, but every time I step into that gym I am happy knowing that we all have each other’s backs. We are all striving for the same goals and we are taking this journey together.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”