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Sooo last week I explained how things were…what word did I overuse? Oh yes. I remember. Rough. I ended saying that a new week was approaching and approach it did. Fast. And now it’s basically over. You probably want some details. Am I right? Well, I suppose…

Let’s start with the end of last week. It was my husband’s 30th birthday Friday so we had a party for him. I commended myself for not having ANY alcoholic beverages at the party – even though all around me there were a lot of very “happy” people. I thought I would feel left out, but to be honest, I didn’t. So that was good. But…my will power faltered as I brought out two large pans of brownies. I was crossing my fingers that they would all get eaten (by everyone else, of course!). Apparently that was wishful thinking though because there was just enough left over for me to gaze at….and eat. Ok, I only had one but you get my point. I realized then what my weakness is – baked goods. Admitting it is the first step, right?

Fast forward to now. I’ve been working out and following my diet, all the while a little gingerbread man is sitting on my shoulder smelling delicious and whispering sweet nothings in my ear. I have a feeling he’s going to be there for a while. But that’s ok. He can camp out for all I care…this is too important to me. I’m not letting some little crumb get in my way.

It’s week three already? Wow… Time in this program is flying by! Then again, with so many things hindering me from getting to the gym most days, it should seem like it’s going slowly… One week, pink eye, the next, a severe sunburn on my back… I just can’t win, hmn? These days I’m away from the gym are hardest… I want to be there each and every day, yet with this severe burn, I can barely move. Still, I’m doing my very best to stick with ‘Thin It to Win It.’

I’ve found that, despite my unfortunate hindrances, the most difficult thing for me isn’t getting to the gym… It’s the food I eat. I’ve been struggling, trying to fight the cravings I’ve been having. Yes, I’ve been sticking to my diet as closely as I can, yet I will admit, I’m still slipping up at times. See, I’ve been using food as a comfort item for a long time. I used to eat whenever I was bored or felt stressed… I’ve kicked that habit, thankfully. Now, I just have to continue to fight to lower my portions and stick to the path of healthy foods. I think, with a little more time, things will get easier.

The exercises I’ve done at Flab to Fab and those I’ve done at home may hurt like crazy when they’re being performed, yet, over even this short amount of time, I’ve noticed that the pain has eased up. I’m beginning to feel better when I work out, and I don’t have the severe aches and pains anymore. Don’t be fooled; It still hurts, and everything is still a struggle… Such is just not as bad of a struggle as it was when I first started this program.

I just need everyone to know that, no matter what gets in my way, I’ll fight it off and keep at this competition as if my life depends upon it… Which, in reality, it does. If I want to live a healthy life, I can’t be carrying so much weight around. I need to kick the habits which have caused my obesity and kick some butt to keep it off. I’ll do whatever it takes.

I’ve been hitting the gyms pretty hard this week.  I say gyms because I go to the Y about three times a week.  My kids love the activities they offer and we’ve been members for years.  I’ve tried to lose weight and get healthier there in the past but nothing really stuck.  I wasn’t ready.  My family wasn’t ready.  Its tough enough to motivate yourself but try convincing four kids, two of which the idea of child-watch or daycare is foreign, that its okay that Mommie’s going to drop you off with people you don’t know.  Now that my kids are old enough to recognize that I’m coming back, I just have to convince me.  And I’m generally pretty rational.

But there is also something special about Flab to Fab that is making this time different. When I have to take this kids, my two year old usually ends up sitting on my stomach while we do abs.She’s comfortable there, I’m comfortable with her there (NOT physically) and it doesn’t interfere with my group’s workout.  I don’t have to postpone being a mom to get healthy.  The times I don’t have to bring the kids are awesome too.  I can do the group exercise session totally concentrating on the workout.  During the individual cardio, I put in my ear buds and listen to music that’s not about a party in my tummy and just burn it up.  Those 25 minutes flies!

This week I’m going to be more diligent about reading food labels.  Specifically the sugar content in food.  I have not been following the diet to the letter and though my endurance has increased, I haven’t seen the results I would have liked.  I’m sure its because of the sugar I eat and drink.  Ketchup, barbeque and spaghetti sauces, and iced tea are things I know have sugar.  But there’s even sugar in chicken patties!   I don’t want this to be yet another attempt at losing the weight; it needs to be the last.  So, I’m all in–one meal at a time, one workout at a time, one day at a time.  Its how I gained the weight in the first place…and its the best way to eat an elephant.

I’m one of those people who will go shopping for clothes, and if I don’t see what I want in my size I’ll decide to buy one size smaller because I have every intention of fitting into it “someday”.  Or I’ll buy clothes without trying them on, and when I get home and realize they are too small, I’ll keep them, because “someday” I might fit into it!  So far, this illusive “someday” hasn’t arrived, but I think I can see it in the distance!

When I was told we were already doing our second round of measurements, I was really nervous about it.  I figured there was no way I would see any results after just two weeks.  I’m happy to say that I am wrong!  It wasn’t a HUGE difference, but its progress and that’s all I’m asking for!  As soon as I left the gym I had to call my husband and tell him how excited I was about it…I’m not sure that he really understood anything I said because I was probably talking a mile a minute, but he could tell I was excited so he acted accordingly.

I’m starting to look forward more and more to each workout, as much as I look forward to seeing the other girls at the workout.  It’s awesome to be working with other girls who have a common goal, and we are able to support each other to achieve it.  I’ve also been very lucky to have many supportive friends and family through this challenge who also want to see me succeed (and are willing to bust my butt with additional workouts).

I’m in a very happy place right now, and I plan to stay here for a while longer .

I can’t believe how fast the weeks are flying by! I notice every day in the gym I am feeling a little bit stronger. I am learning so many ways to exercise that I never knew about and the smallest movements can really work out your whole body. I really enjoy that every day we mix it up and do different things. We do a little of everything such as aerobics, cardio and strength training. My favorite is cardio even though it is the one that kicks my butt the most! I enjoy working out in the mornings most because it makes me really want to watch what I eat the rest of the day.  I get so sweaty and out of breath but after I leave the gym, I feel so proud of myself for not giving up. This experience has definitely opened my eyes to how out of shape I am. I guess I was kind of in denial before, but now is the chance for everything to change! Being a 22-year-old girl, I shouldn’t have so many aches and pains at my age. Also, I am on high blood pressure medication and that is another thing I want to get off of. I have so many reasons as motivation to finally get this weight off of me.

On Tuesday night, I had a set back and tripped down my basement steps. I could hardly put any pressure on my left foot so I had my doctor take an xray. I am happy to say that there is nothing broken or fractured and that it is just sprained. My doctor cleared me to work out but to just take it easy for the next couple days. I am so thankful that it was just a false alarm. I am not going to let this get in my way of my goals. I know after a couple days my foot will be feeling as good as new. I am so glad I have such a great support system at home with my fiance Mike and in the gym with Lisa and all the girls. I am eager to start seeing big changes and start my new life.

Melanie

This week has been a real eye opener for me. I missed a workout session to go to Cedar Point with my best friend. I had read a blog before going that said if you are over a size 18, to not even bother. That really freaked me out, but being a huge roller coaster fanatic I decided to go anyways. Sure enough, there were two rides I couldn’t fit on. I felt so embarrassed! I guess I never truly realized how overweight I am. I know it was only 2 out of a whole lot, but still. It just makes me want to work that much harder and go back in a few months and be able to ride EVERYTHING!

On a much lighter and happier note, we got measured again, and in two weeks I have already lost over 4 inches on my body! It’s so exciting to know that all this hard work is really making a difference. Working out isn’t easy, but I’m really starting to enjoy it. I love pushing myself to the limit. I love that I can already see a difference. I just want to jump up and down ALL the time because I am so excited that they picked ME!!! I have never felt so special…

I can’t wait to see what else is in store for us!

If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.  ~Vincent Van Gogh

As of late my hardest challenge has been silencing that voice.  However, that voice does not tell me I cannot paint, that voice tells me me to give up…that I can’t do this.   “Small” has never been my thing,  basically large tasks are hard for me because they take small steps.  My weight is the perfect example of this… My ideal weight seems forever away, 5 pounds is progress but very small step in a series of hundreds of small steps.  It is hard for me to accept that I need to take things one step at a time, especially when the reward seems so far away.

When I am uncomfortable I make jokes…humor is my comfort mask.  Sometimes that mask causes a lot of self-doubt, I make a joke and then I think about how true what I said was and how truly unfunny my joke was.  This experience has been very hard for me so far but looking at me all you will see is the smile I put on.  I never want people around to see just how unhappy I have been, so I hide behind the humor.   The other day I was asked what my goal weight was and i thought about it and came up with a rough number, but in coming up with that number I realized I want…no I need to lose 220 pounds.   This thought made me very uncomfortable so I cracked the joke that not only do I need to lose a persons,  I need to lose an obese person.   Everyone laughed, even me…but inside I wanted to cry because that made being thin seem even farther away.

So my small step for this week is to shut out that negative voice, to prove myself wrong, to lose that extra person and with her all the negative and self-doubting thoughts.  I CAN DO THIS AND I WILL!