I really am not a fan of reality TV.  Anyone can fall in love with someone when the world is perfect around you and you are constantly being wined and dined, teenage pregnancy should not be the way to get noticed, and anyone can loose 8 to 10 pounds a week if they worked out 6 plus hours a day, had someone cooking for them and didn’t participate in the real world.

Adria, Casie, Melanie, Rita, Tica, Kelly and Stephanie on the other hand are all loosing weight and inches while, raising children, working, cooking for husbands, attending family summer picnics and enjoying the festivities Erie has to offer in the summer time.

These women are working very hard in a world that is not as forgiving.  Television commercials promote processed  food.  You can have  dinner with your family without ever getting out of the car.  Junk food is easy to grab and go, but I say so is an apple.  Everyday life is taxing, emotionally and physically, how we handle it helps define who we are.

So I ask anyone who sees these women out and about, to encourage them, take the journey with them, write on their blogs or vote for your favorite.

The real world, not the “reality” world is where the action is!

Lisa

This week I did almost every work out at home.  Time for the gym didn’t exist, which I hated to be very honest.   I miss the gym, the girls, the support in general.  Life decided to take a sharp turn into busy land.  Things should be back to normal next week, including gym time in the morning!  Basically this week was a week of missing everybody and feeling like I am getting nothing done.  Working out at home just doesn’t give you that satisfied feeling.

Since I have been unable to make it to the gym I have been doing cardio by using the steps in my house. (Even at the gym I hate steps!)  Let me tell you how much i miss the air conditioning at the gym,  I never even knew it was possible for me to sweat that much!  No matter how uncomfortable I feel I keep pushing myself.  Life can drive down busy street all day long I’m not giving up, I can always find time to at least do something.
So until i get back to the gym on a regular schedule I just have to remember:

No one ever drowned in sweat.
~Ann Landers

I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and…

And…well…that’s it. But this is the first time (in a long time) that I actually feel it.

My definition of “pretty” might be different, though. I feel pretty on the inside. I feel like I’m worth it. I’m worth making the effort. I’m worth taking care of. I feel stronger and more confident. I feel like I can do this. I just wish I would have felt this way all along…I wouldn’t have let myself get so big. I just honestly didn’t care about myself. It’s not that I ate huge portions or just junk food. I looove my veggies! I just didn’t exercise. And I did eat a lot of carbs. But I didn’t care. I think I still kind of felt that way at the beginning of this whole thing. But now I do care about myself. I want to be around for a very long time. I want to have kids. I want to be the fun, spontaneous person I once was. I want to be stronger. I want to be thinner. I want to be healthier. And I will. Because now I feel pretty.

This experience has been so amazing in so many different ways. I have never exercised and been this active my whole life. I have never sweat so much either! Now that I am in a routine of working out, I can’t believe I didn’t start this a long time ago. I keep pushing myself beyond what I thought I was capable of and I’m learning I am a lot stronger than I ever thought I was. I am not the most coordinated or strong person in the gym but that doesn’t matter. I am still trying my best and will continue to until I reach my long term goals. My struggle with food is the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. I tried to totally change my diet at the beginning of this journey and I failed. I have made some great changes to my diet but I still have had some days of serious regret. I have gone through some pretty tough things during my childhood and high school and food has always been my crutch. It is pretty embarrasing to say but I almost feel like I have a food addiction sometimes. Using food for comfort is what I’ve done for 22 years of my life whether I was depressed or stressed, it is what I would always turn to. I never was that overweight growing up but then after high school, I really just didn’t monitor my food intake what so ever. So since 2007 to now, I have gained around 150 pounds. It hurts me so much and makes me wonder why I would let my weight get this out of control. And then I have to face the cold hard truth, I don’t feel like I’m worth it. I pretty much gave up. My love is so huge for the people in my life and then when it comes to me it is so very small. No one should go through life not loving who they see in the mirror. I want to feel beautiful and love myself more than I have ever wanted anything in my life. This experience has definitely jump started my self esteem but there is a lot of damage to fix. I have a long road ahead of me and there are going to be bumps along the way but I am not giving up, not this time.

In a show I watch often the speaker said that in stressful or challenging situations you can either have power over it or pity for it.  One or the other, but not both.  This week has been a challenge mostly in areas that I do not have control over.  So in those areas I do all that I can do and surrender the rest to God.  But in determining the difference between two areas I have realized that there is a great deal that I do control.  I cannot control people’s attitudes or actions but I can control my reaction to them.

I cannot help that I am not able to be at Flab to Fab as regularly as I have been but I can absolutely control what I put in my mouth and what I say with my mouth.  Positive speaking and conscientious eating are my main allies right now.  The spare moments I do have are utilized for exercise.  I am definitely using the resources I have available to me and I am pretty happy about the results.  More importantly I am excited about my potential after the challenge is over.  Lisa is eventually going to stop checking my fridge, Shanna will no longer be jogging along the side of the Windstar, and Linda and her Tie-Dye’s presence cannot will me through a class.  The women who have helped me focus, challenged me to do more than what I am used to, and prayed for and with me at the gym are blessings that I couldn’t have thought up myself. It is definitely one thing to invest in a gym membership so that you can exercise but it is an entirely different thing when the people at the gym are invested in you.  So I’m taking that Flab to Fab inspiration everywhere that I go.  I am definitely choosing power as my reward over this challenge and I hope the other girls are doing the same.

Hello again! I guess since last week was kind of based on my venting and frustration, this week should be about all of the positive things coming from this experience. I think the one thing I have noticed is that people are actually gaining something from my blogs and my new way of life! My family is with me every step of the way. Since I want to eat healthy, they want to eat healthy. It’s an amazing ripple effect! To be called an inspiration by my brother brings tears to my eyes, and my mom’s. My whole family deals with weight issues and I’m proud to say we are ALL taking steps in the right direction. I know they are proud of me and I hope they know how truly proud I am of THEM! I am looking forward to the results that will come to all of us. I know I will be able to be more comfortable in my own skin in doing things I already do as well. I’m mostly looking forward to being slimmer for next year’s Roar on the Shore! I rode with my cousin Paul (who rocks!   ) this summer and I can’t wait to do it again next year!

I have also noticed both friends and people at the gym acknowledge my hard work and dedication who want to do the same in their lives as well, whether it be losing weight, going to the gym, or just in general. That means more than I can explain with words. Every day is a challenge but as the weeks go by I can honestly say I have put 100% into it. I hope everyone can feel as accomplished as I do. Soon this competition will be over, the blogs will be over and everything will go back to normal. FYI, I dread that day! For now, I am enjoying every second of this fantastic experience!

Time flies when you’re having fun, doesn’t it? I know I say it every week, yet it’s true. I can’t believe I have come this far. I submitted an essay so long ago, thinking that I would probably never hear about it again… Yet then I recieved the call for an interview. I thought I was so fortunate to get that far… To push further seemed like a stretch. I thought, ‘no way I’ll be picked…’ Even though I really wanted to. When I recieved the call from Lisa asking if I wanted to be one of the contestants, I was so overjoyed that I cried. Nothing had ever happened like that! Yet that seems like a lifetime ago, really.

And yet, it doesn’t seem like that long ago at all. Funny how things can be like that, huh? When I started this whole competition, I hadn’t really anticipated the struggles I would face, or even what fun I’d have. Never in my life did I think that I would enjoy exercise, and yet I do. I find any bit of fun I can when working out, and it isn’t hard to find. Something else I didn’t anticipate were the friends I would gain in the process of this all. Every morning, I wake up with a grin on my face, and I can’t wait to see the other girls. I’ll always chime a ‘good morning!’ hoping that I’ll help start their morning with a smile. They’ve all done so amazingly, as well, and I have learned so much from them in the process.

All I can say is that I hope these friendships and good times will continue long after this competition. I know I won’t be going anywhere when it’s all over. Keep it up, everyone!

I did a 12 minute mile this week! I was so excited that the natural high seemed to last all day!  It was a great feeling, and a big accomplishment for me.  I’m slowly but surely preparing for that 5K!  Running outside where the pretty much anyone can see me still makes me nervous, but hopefully after I run a few more 12 minute miles, I might be feeling a little more confident.

My life this week has turned into a balancing act.  School is back in session, which means my life picks up the pace because I work with kids in school.  I’m trying to figure out how to balance my time so that I have time for everything.  I need time for work, working out, preparing meals, spending time with my husband (who has a birthday this week!) spending time with my family and friends, and of course, at some point I need to sleep!  I haven’t been to the gym this week as much as I want to, but I’m hoping to settle into a good schedule that allows me at least a few hours a week to work out.  A guilty feeling starts to roll over me on days that I don’t workout, and I don’t like it!